even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
my being single is dangerous.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
