Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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