i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
Randomize
