windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
OH MY GOD IT'S LIKE SHOOTING FISH IN A BARREL, EXCEPT INSTEAD OF FISH THEY ARE FIGHTER PILOTS
And then my night got REAL pukey
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Randomize
