I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
