jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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