it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
