If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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