he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
