I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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