with your own penis?
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
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He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
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