I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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