Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
