so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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