I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
Randomize