i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
Was it a good night or a bad night when you have to apologize to someone the next day for trying to fuck them with a turtle?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
