Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
