btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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