They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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