I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize
