I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Hello and welcome to the game 'Matt needs weed'! Rules are simple: first one to find a bag wins the fabulous prize of getting stoned with yours truly. Thank you for playing and good luck!!
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Randomize
