I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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