You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
Randomize
