Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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