So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Four minutes until I can fart!
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
