wake up i wanna do it froggy style
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
