i'm almost one hundred percent positive that i have a warrant out for my arrest in this city. i also don't give a fuck because im drinking TEQUILAAAA
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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