I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
So the bitch asked me if I wanted the name brand or the generic contraceptive. Does it look like I want to be generically pregnant?
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
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