Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Instead of politely asking me to shave, he passive-aggressively left me a groupon for a bikini wax. So I passive-aggresively fucked his roommate. And his roommate didn't mind my bush when he went down on me. Anyway, do you want the groupon or not?
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
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