The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Randomize
