I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Randomize