I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
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