we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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