i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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