they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Damn victory sex feels great
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
