why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
