I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Randomize