its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
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From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
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so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.