I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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