So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
What is this nonsense on the table
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.