yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He left an unopened 12 pack of beer by my bed. I guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex..
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Randomize
