He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
