closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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