I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
My liver just had a heart attack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize