My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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