are you so shy because you have an std?
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
