Texts From Last Night

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  (559): View more from California

  I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.

  (1-559): View more from California

  Yup.

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  (559): I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again. (1-559): Yup. http://tfl.nu/egb3
  Replies (20) Good night (1145) Bad night (2490)
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.

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  (208): My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done. http://tfl.nu/2aew
  Replies (23) Good night (4143) Bad night (1897)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth

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  (405): I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth http://tfl.nu/n9x2
  Replies (9) Good night (830) Bad night (3775)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed

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  (561): Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed http://tfl.nu/ippt
  Replies (9) Good night (2518) Bad night (823)
• Favorite

  (817): View more from Texas

  Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...

  (1-817): View more from Texas

  This hangover makes more sense now

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  (817): Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"... (1-817): This hangover makes more sense now http://tfl.nu/3zvy
  Replies (11) Good night (2412) Bad night (515)
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.

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  (859): if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it. http://tfl.nu/6uvx
  Replies (10) Good night (2726) Bad night (561)
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.

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  (734): Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins. http://tfl.nu/ngas
  Replies (5) Good night (562) Bad night (663)
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  (831): View more from California

  if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please

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  (831): if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please http://tfl.nu/sfv9
  Replies (11) Good night (1356) Bad night (562)
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  (828): View more from North Carolina

  btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..

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  (828): btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits.. http://tfl.nu/2wvn
  Replies (10) Good night (317) Bad night (899)
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  (212): View more from New York

  That accounts for only three of the penises

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  (212): That accounts for only three of the penises http://tfl.nu/jbaz
  Replies (6) Good night (623) Bad night (356)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.

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  (660): I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now. http://tfl.nu/b4q6
  Replies (5) Good night (1082) Bad night (535)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Check the mailbox while you're out!

  (1-306): View more from Saskatchewan

  I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.

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  (306): Check the mailbox while you're out! (1-306): I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree. http://tfl.nu/rtqa
  Replies (0) Good night (539) Bad night (220)
• Favorite

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.

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  (908): 4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden. http://tfl.nu/r37f
  Replies (3) Good night (519) Bad night (173)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...

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  (856): his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits... http://tfl.nu/dl6r
  Replies (3) Good night (584) Bad night (412)
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening

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  (216): Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening http://tfl.nu/drvy
  Replies (4) Good night (452) Bad night (215)

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