i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
My bed is full of blood and feathers
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
well, you know. whores of a feather.