the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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