Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
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