whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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