we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You got into an extremely loud argument with a juggalo and slapped him, he started crying and everyone cheered.
I remember that, it happened before I started drinking. I thought you said I did something shameful?
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Randomize
