They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize