Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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